"Boys," Ginny sniffed.

"Right," Hermione agreed non-committally.

"Of course, that'd include Fred, wouldn't it?" She lowered her voice. "You didn't come home last night."

Hermione blushed and turned away from Ginny's searching gaze, only to find herself face to face with Lavender, Parvati and Padma. "Er, hello."

"We thought we'd join you," Parvati informed them, her eyes flashing with curiosity. "Did you spend your summer at the Weasleys, Hermione?

"The last part of it."

"And how did that go? I would imagine you must be getting to the point of strangling Ron, hmm?"

"I really don't know what you mean, Parvati."

"Well, you like him, don't you? And he's dense."

"Ron's got a girlfriend," Hermione stated. "So I really don't know what you're on about."

"You're just letting him date someone else? You don't care?"

"Why should she? She's dating Fred." Ginny made a face and clapped her hand over her mouth. "Sorry," she muttered from behind her palm.

"Nothing to be sorry about," Hermione shrugged. "It's not like we're keeping it a secret."

"You're dating Fred? Fred Weasley?" Padma asked archly.

"Instead of Ron?" Parvati finished her twin's though.

"Ron's dating me." Luna lowered her ever-present copy of the Quibbler.

"Ron's dating you?" Lavender's eyes danced. "And Hermione's dating Fred? Oh, how I wish I'd spent the summer with you guys."

"And how grateful are we that you didn't," Ginny muttered under her breath as Lavender stepped past her to sit next to Luna.

"Tell us about Ron."

"You know Ron," Luna reminded her from behind her paper.

"Not about dating Ron." She looked quickly at Hermione as the Patil twins settled on the seat to the left of her. "Has he kissed you?"

"He wouldn't even dance with me on our one date," Padma groused.

"Well, he was distracted, wasn't he?" Parvati stated as she glanced in Hermione's direction. "He and Harry were both terrible dates."

Lavender ignored them, her attention solely on Luna. "Is he a good kisser?"

"He's not done anything wrong."

"That's a ringing endorsement."

Padma laughed. "For Ron it is!"

"He's really quite romantic, actually." Luna blinked slowly at Lavender. "He's been most solicitous this summer."

Padma glanced at Hermione, whose eyes were closed, again then back at Luna, lowering her voice. "Doesn't it bother you? That he likes Hermione?"

"Hermione is right here," Hermione said softly without opening her eyes. "And has not gone deaf."

"Fine then," Parvati turned to face her. "Tell us the truth. You're not really dating Fred, are you? You're just doing it to make Ron jealous? Or to show him you're not jealous, even though you are, because he asked someone else out. You're just trying not to be heartbroken, aren't you?"

"My relationship with Fred is, thankfully, none of your business, though I'm more than happy to assure you that it has nothing in the world to do with Ron."

"Oh," Parvati rolled her eyes. "Of course."

"As for Ron and Luna, I think they make quite a lovely couple and I know that she's treating Ron exactly as I would hope for any friend of mine. And, as far as that goes, I'd appreciate it greatly if you'd stop continuing to insult Luna by implying that Ron's relationship with her has anything to do with me."

"Well then," Lavender smirked at Hermione, her eyes narrowed, "if everything's fine and dandy with you dating Fred," her mocking tone remained unconvinced, "and Ron's dating Luna, then why aren't Ron and Harry in here?"

"Maybe they wanted to see the friends they haven't spent the last month with?"

"Maybe they're talking about Luna and Ron?" Lavender got on her knees and pressed her ear to the wall, digging for her wand when she couldn't hear anything.

"And maybe they're talking about Quidditch," Hermione suggested tiredly. "I really don't…" her voice cut off as Seamus's voice filled the car.

"…but Ron! She's got massive breasts!"

"Silencio!" Hermione lifted her wand and killed the sound, cringing a bit as Seamus's voice echoed. When she lowered it, she noticed that Lavender, Padma and Parvati were all looking at her chest. She opened her hands in question and they quickly averted their gaze to Luna. She was staring back at all of them, most notably Ginny who had her arms crossed over her chest.

Parvati sniffed. "Well, that doesn't prove anything. You can't prove that you're dating Fred…"

"Why would she lie?" Ginny asked. "And to you?"

"She's not lying," Padma allowed. "She's just not telling the whole truth. She's obviously just trying to make Ron jealous and now that he's got a girlfriend of his own and doesn't care, and she and Fred are still pretending because otherwise it'd be obvious, wouldn't it?" She leaned forward and patted Luna's knee. "But don't worry. We're sure that Ron likes you." Satisfied, she stood up. "Come on, let's go visiting."

The three of them trooped out and Hermione sighed in relief, scooting to the corner of the long bench and bringing her knees to her chest. "Oh, thank goodness."

"Of course, by the time we reach school, everyone will know everything they think they know," Ginny blushed. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. They're going to think what they want to think regardless." She glanced at Luna. "I'm sorry you got caught up in all of this. You're going to have a million questions back at Ravenclaw tonight, I'd imagine."

"Oh, no. They won't talk to me. Or they'll try but then they'll get tired." She smiled widely. "Whose breasts do you think they were talking about?"

"I…don't know," Hermione admitted.

"Perhaps I'll go see." She tucked her paper beneath her arm and stood up. "Ron's probably neglected to tell his friends about me, don't you think?" She grinned and headed for the door. "I'll see you later."

Ginny waved to Luna then scooted down opposite Hermione who had dropped her head to her knees. "You okay?"

"I'm fine." She lifted her hand to assure the younger girl. "The three of them give me a headache on the best of days and after just a couple…" She broke off and wrapped her arms over the top of her head.

"Did you," Ginny blushed and dropped her voice. "Did you sleep with Fred?"

"We slept," she admitted.

"Did you…?"

"No." She turned her head to meet Ginny's eyes. "We didn't."

"Did you want to?"

"Are you asking me if I wanted to sleep with Fred or are you asking me if I'm still interested in Ron?" Hermione smiled sadly. "Because, and I'm not trying to be mean, but every time someone asks me about Fred, I get the feeling they're really just interested in what it means to Ron."

"I know you like Fred." Ginny's voice was adamant and slightly hurt. "I've been there all summer, remember? I've seen the way Fred treats you. I've seen the way Ron treats you."

"The two really have nothing to do with each other." Hermione lifted her head and stared at the doorway to the compartment. "Maybe at first? Ron always says the first thing that pops into his head and it's almost always exactly what he shouldn't say. And that hurts after a while. And maybe I did go out with Fred to see how Ron would react. But after the day at the shop and our first date? I really did like Fred. And when I was with him, I didn't think much about Ron at all."

"But you still like Ron, right?"

Hermione bit her lip, surprised by the sudden tears that stung her eyes. "I'll always like Ron, Ginny. He was my first…" she blushed hotly. "But he's with Luna now."

"He's just with her to hurt you."

"It doesn't matter why he's with her. It matters that he is. And I'm with Fred."

"If he wasn't? With Luna?"

Hermione turned and faced Ginny, taking the younger girl's hands in hers. "It doesn't matter. I'm with Fred. And I really, really want to be with Fred." She blushed. "Being with Fred is nice."

"I'm glad." Ginny smiled. "You think you'll…sleep with him?"

"Fred?" Hermione blushed hotly. "I don't know."

"When are you going to see him again?"

"Well, your parents weren't too thrilled with walking in on us, and with school starting, we're probably going to take a bit of time to let things cool down and let me get back into my routine."

"That's right," Ginny laughed. "You've not studied the summer away, you're almost behind in your classes, based on your schedule."

Hermione blushed at the thought of the studying she'd done the night before and shifted on the seat, curling one leg under her. "Yeah. I've got a lot of studying to do."

"I heard that he doesn't even know he's supposed to be dating her," someone whispered just loud enough for her to hear as Hermione walked past. "She's making it up to make Ron jealous."

"Backfired though, didn't it? He's been with Loony Luna all around campus. I even saw him with his hand up her shirt."

"You did not!"

"Did so. He said he was just adjusting her tie, but I know what it looks like when a guy's touching a girl under her shirt."

"And how do you know? Hmmm?"

Hermione kept walking, her head down. She'd had a constant headache since school started, everyone including the first years were speculating on the state of her relationships, every instant she was near or around Ron calling her relationship with Fred into question.

Even worse, the Slytherins had jumped on the bandwagon, getting in constant digs about how she might as well have picked an even less likely person to choose as her boyfriend.

"You holding up okay?"

"Careful. Talking to me is most likely going to start a whole new wave of rumors." She gave Ron a weak smile. "By this time tomorrow, I'll have begged you to dump Luna, take me back and forgive me for ever even thinking of another man."

"That one's not so bad." Ron laughed at her annoyed glare. "Better than the one I heard. Apparently, you're really dating Harry, but you're using Fred as a decoy because if I were to find out about you and Harry, I'd kill myself."

"Oh, I hadn't heard that one yet."

"It's my favorite so far."

"Are there any that actual believe I'm dating Fred?"

"So far? Not that I've heard. Although I did hear that you had a threesome with the twins."

"Right. Well, you know, that one's true." She laughed at his face. "Kidding, Ron."

"I knew that."

"Sure you did." She raked her hands through her hair, mussing the spell that was keeping it tamed down.

"It'll die down, Hermione."

"When? It's already been two weeks. I'm about to strangle the next person I see whispering in my vicinity. I don't even care what they're talking about."

They passed a group of third year girls who all stared at them then fell together, whispering and giggling, one of them running off in the direction of another group.

"Great. By dinner tonight I figure you and I will have had an illicit shag against a bookcase in the library."

"That one's good too."

"Ron!"

"I'm sorry." He held up his hands. "I'm sorry. I am taking this seriously, Hermione, I promise. But I don't know what else to do. We're friends and classmates and housemates and we're going to be seen together. Unless you plan on avoiding me entirely?"

"And start a wave of theories about how we broke each other's hearts? No thank you."

"You did."

"What?"

"Nothing." He shook his head. "Luna and I broke up."

"Oh?" She asked lightly. "When?"

"Back at the Burrow. She's just been playing along, fueling the rumors, I guess. But I think we're going to stop. Not that it'll make a difference in how they…what?" He turned to look at her, realizing she'd stopped. "What?"

She stood still for a moment then took off at a run, transforming into a swirl of hair and robes and red as Fred scooped her up in his arms, caught somewhere between twirling, hugging and kissing her.

"Oh."

Fred set her down and smoothed her hair with his hands, framing her face as he looked down at her. "Hello, love."

"Hello."

He bent his head and kissed her properly, one hand sliding down her back to pull her closer as both of hers clung to his jacket. He released her slowly, relishing the sweet taste of her. Looking up, he noticed Ron and released her carefully, slightly uncomfortable. "Hey, Ron."

"Fred."

"You two are all right then?" He looked at Hermione and she nodded, then at Ron. "And you and I, little brother? Can we have a truce?"

Ron was about to answer, his glare prefacing the very vitriolic no he had planned, but he stopped at the look of hope on Hermione's face. Her large eyes pleaded with him and he forced himself to swallow the anger that had begun boiling the second he'd realized it was Fred. "Yeah. Not that you deserve it."

"Trust me, Ron, there's absolutely nothing you could say that could top what Mum and Dad said." He flushed and turned back to Hermione, tucking his arm around her shoulders. "Where were you two headed?"

"Back to Gryffindor." Hermione picked up her book bag from where she'd dropped it, her cheeks tinged with pink as Fred took it from her, slinging it over his shoulder as he started walking with her. Ron tagged along behind, silently seething, hating that he now not only had to be nice to his brother, but that, until he'd shown up unannounced, he and Hermione had been joking. They'd been friends.

"You don't mind that I came?" Fred asked quietly.

"Mum and Dad know you're here?"

Fred glanced back at Ron. "I'm a big boy, Ron. Don't have to tell them where I am or where I'm going."

"Even when it comes to Hermione?"

"Remember that truce, Ron?" Fred asked softly, his joking tone doing little to disguise the dangerous undertone. They reached the portrait hole and the Fat Lady blinked at Fred.

"What's the password?"

"Higgledy piggledy." Hermione stated, her eyebrow arched as the portrait debated whether or not to let Fred in.

The painting swung open. Ron slipped past them both into the common room, followed first by Hermione then by Fred. As he straightened, there seemed to be a collective gasp followed quickly by shouts and calls and a mass of Gryffindors pressing in around them.

"You'd think they hadn't just seen me two weeks ago," Fred chuckled to Hermione who still clung to his hand.

"Hail the conquering hero," she assured him.

"I even look the part, don't I?" He glanced down at his lizard skin jacket and the dark leather of his boots.

"Shall I start fighting off the adoring masses for you now, Mr. Weasley?" She asked disdainfully. "Or would you like a few of them to touch you?"

"Touching could be nice."

Hermione's eyebrow was crooked almost to her hairline. "I'm sorry?"

"I mean…" He broke off as he realized Parvati and Lavender were standing in front of him, arms crossed over their chests, toes tapping on the floor. "Er, hello."

"So you really are dating Hermione?" Parvati asked incredulously. "She wasn't just making it up because Ron's dating Luna?"

"Well, if she is," he glanced down at her and grinned, stealing another quick kiss, "she's yet to let me know about it." He looked back at the two girls, one eyebrow cocked quizzically. "Was there anything else?"

"You're dating Hermione?"

He nodded slowly, enunciating each syllable precisely. "Yes. I. Am."

"But what about Ron?"

"Well, I thought about dating Ron," he admitted. "But there's that whole taboo thing, coupled with the fact that both of us seem to be screamingly heterosexual, not to mention that George gets awfully jealous."

"Not you." Parvati pointed to Hermione. "You."

"What about me?"

"And what about me?" Ron asked loudly from the corner where he'd flopped down into a chair by Harry. "Aren't you going to ask me if I even want to date Hermione? Did you think that maybe I've got no interest in her at all and want her to be dating Fred?"

"Well, that's just ridiculous, Ron. We've all seen you look at her." Lavender turned her attention back to Hermione. "And you're no better, so we want to know what's going on."

"Is this because I turned you down the other day at the store, Lavender?" Fred shook his head. "You're not going to hold that against Hermione, are you?"

"Turned me…what?"

"I do appreciate that you wanted to do something together, but I really am a one woman sort of guy."

Hermione looked affronted. "You asked out my boyfriend?"

"He didn't say he was going out with…no!" Lavender blushed and glanced over at Seamus. "I didn't ask you out."

"Really?" Fred grinned, winking at her. "That's not what I heard."

"What is going on here?" Professor McGonagall swept into the room, her stern voice sending first and second years scattering, leaving only the older students gathered around Fred. "Well, well. Mr. Weasley."

"Professor." He took her hand and kissed the back of it. "You're looking lovely as usual."

"Your flattery is liable to land you in almost as much trouble as your pranks, Mr. Weasley. You may want to refrain from overusing it."

"Yes, ma'am."

"And do I want to know what it is you're doing back here at Hogwarts? Come to finish your final term?"

"No, ma'am. Just visiting family and friends."

"Hermione's his girlfriend," Lavender snapped, obviously angry. "He's probably come to snog her on school grounds."

McGonagall's eyebrow lifted lazily and Fred fought his grin. "Is that so, Miss Granger?"

"That he's my boyfriend, Professor?"

"Or if he came to snog you. I'll accept an answer to either question." She held Hermione's gaze, her mouth quirking as the younger girl blushed. "Fell free to surprise me with which one it is."

"Er," Hermione swallowed. "Yes?"

"In that case, I'll remind you that you have much to study for this weekend so you might wish to take that into account when you plan your evening activities. I'll remind Mr. Weasley that he's spent more than a few instances sprawled at the base of the steps up to the girls' dormitory and he'd do well not to be found there tonight because, as he is not a student, there is absolutely no reason for me to show him any mercy." She tilted her head. "Am I understood?"

"Yes, Professor," they answered in unison.

"Excellent. That said," she turned and walked to the portrait hole. "As he is no longer a student, it is imprudent for Mr. Weasley to be in the common room, which means I'm afraid I'm going to have to leave any nocturnal activities you wish to partake in to the mercies of the castle itself."

"I'll just be," Fred gave Hermione a sad look, "going then, eh?"

McGonagall answered before Hermione had a chance to, not quite disguising the laughter in her voice. "Yes, Mr. Weasley. I believe you will."

"I'll," Hermione glanced at McGonagall with wary eyes, "Just walk him out?"

"That, Miss Granger, will be fine."

"Whooo. Dealing with Umbridge for a year made her even sharper, didn't it?"

"Dealing with Umbridge for a year made us all sharper." Hermione laced her fingers through his and sighed. "I don't want you to go."

"I don't want to go." He tugged her into a darkened corner, holding her against his body. "I've missed you."

"I've missed you too."

"And, since you were hanging out with Ron, I haven't been able to even give you a proper hello."

"No?"

He shook his head as he lowered it, his breath warm on her lips. His hands stayed on her shoulders, his thumbs rubbing small circles on her robe. "No."

"And you're going to rectify that?"

"Mmm," he purred, his tongue sliding over her lips, parting them, before diving inside the molten heat of her mouth. Hermione gasped, her lips parting to accommodate his searching tongue, her hands sliding beneath his jacket, feeling the heat of him through his shirt.

"Fred," she murmured, breaking the kiss, pressing her lips to his neck, licking the throbbing pulse that pounded just beneath his skin.

"George is about to kick my ass," he groaned, his hands sliding beneath her robes, stroking her waist through her shirt. "I can't get any damn work done because I just stand around thinking about you and he's about to get me a shirt with an arrow pointing down to my crotch that says 'Yes, I'm thinking of Hermione, why do you ask?'."

She laughed against his skin and he groaned. "What?" She nibbled and licked her way down to his collar.

"Nothing is ever going to be sexier than you doing that."

She giggled again and tugged his shirt free from his jeans, sliding her hands under his shirt. "Not even this?"

"Okay, you could do it naked and that'd be sexier." He pushed up her sweater, his fingers scrabbling in her shirt and tugging it free from her skirt. "Or maybe lying on top of me. Or both." He groaned. "I don't supposed you've got the Marauder's Map on you?"

"I'm not going to have sex with you in some damp, abandoned hallway of Hogwarts, Fred." She slid her hands up his back, her nails raking as she trailed them back down. He shuddered and thrust forward, his body urging closer to hers.

"Don't want to have sex with you," he assured her, his hands sliding up to cup the warm curve of her breasts. "I want to lay you down on one of those damn big fluffy beds you girls get and make slow, sweet love to you until neither of us can breathe."

"Oh." She swallowed hard, her hands moving down to slide over his ass, pulling him closer. "Fred…"

"Shit." He pulled away from her and leaned against the wall opposite, panting harshly. "Professor McGonagall is a very, very, smart woman."

"Oh?" Hermione's brain spun. "Why's that?"

"Because if she'd let me stay in the common room, I'd have learned to walk on the walls to get to your room." He stepped forward and grabbed her robes, pulling her hard against him. "I want you so badly."

"It's mutual," she nodded. "It is."

"That's not helping, love." He kissed her fiercely and put her away from him, slumping against the wall and sliding down to the floor. "I should go."

"You should?"

His eyes were wild and desperate. "Oh, yes." He nodded shakily. "I really, really should."

"I could walk you…"

"No." He stood up and held his hands palm down against the stone wall. "I think the smartest thing in the world for you to do right now is go back to your room, study like a good little Gryffindor and promise me you'll see me before I go mad."

"You're going to go mad?"

"If I don't see you again soon."

She moved toward him, her hips swaying slightly, her clothes mussed and rumpled, her eyes hazy with desire. "You'll see me soon."