As soon as she got to Giles' house however, her "day off" had taken a turn for the more unpleasant. She'd had an argument with Giles about her training schedule. And then two vamps, a man and a woman, had given her one hell of a fight on her way over to the Bronze. She had managed to stake them both, but not before the guy had ripped the sleeve on her new shirt. The new pink shirt my Mom bought me last week. The new pink shirt she saw me leave the house with before she left for the weekend. She sighed. Slaying was hard on a wardrobe. Now she was almost there. She could see the small parking lot, and took note that Oz's van was there. Good, she thought. Maybe I can get Willow to ask her Mom to repair my shirt before MY Mom notices. At least I wore a black tank top underneath, she thought, so I don't have to wear a ripped shirt in the Bronze - that would just cause too many questions.

It was when she passed the alley next to the club that her world really turned into a disaster. She thought she heard someone moan and immediately ducked into the alley to investigate. What she saw alarmed her. Willow was lying in an ungainly heap in the middle of the alley, a large and dark bruise beginning to form on her face. Oz was also out cold on the ground, breathing evenly, but with a gash on the side of his head that was bleeding. And near the back of the alley was Cordelia, slowly sitting up and shaking her head. Buffy hesitated, trying to decide who needed help most, and then rushed to Oz's side, stripping off her ripped shirt to use as a bandage and stop the flow of blood.

"Cordelia, what happened?" she asked.

Cordy noticed Buffy's presence. "Buffy?" The sound was muffled.

Buffy saw the gag on Cordy's mouth for the first time and moved away from Oz long enough to remove it. "What happened? Where's Xander? Is he okay?" The questions tumbled out of Buffy's mouth one after the other.

"I'm not sure. There was this woman vampire and she grabbed me inside. Then she dragged me out the back door to here and gave me to Angel. He had the nerve to gag me. Another vampire -- a guy -- came out here right after and they decided to knock me out. That's all I remember.." Cordelia was getting to her feet shakily.

No real answers there, Buffy thought. "Willow and Oz are hurt. Go call an ambulance." Buffy ordered tersely.

Cordelia snapped her mouth shut moved as quickly as she could to obey. Buffy glanced at Oz. He'd stopped bleeding. She moved over to Willow. Feeling gingerly around her head, Buffy felt a large goose-egg bump at the back of her skull. "Not good," she mumbled to herself. And Angel was involved. Maybe he'd taken Xander. Oh God! If he hurts Xander, I'll never forgive myself for not killing him when I had the chance. "Definitely not good," she repeated. "Willow," she cooed to the unconscious girl in her arms. "Wake up. Please?"

Oz fought his way back to consciousness slowly, and through a haze thought he heard Buffy's voice. He tried to concentrate on it to find his way out of the darkness. Then his eyes focussed and he tried to sit up. Buffy was distracted from Willow by movement behind her. "Oz! You okay? What happened here? Where's Xander?"

Oz recalled all the evening's events sluggishly, until the reality of what happened to Xander crashed down upon him. "Oh God," he whispered, seeing that Xander's body was missing. He then noticed that Buffy was cradling Willow in her arms. "Will!" he exclaimed, moving closer to them.. "Is she okay?" "She's breathing." Buffy replied. "How long has she been out?"

Oz glanced at his watch. "Maybe ten minutes."

"Oz," Buffy said determinedly, grabbing his arm with her free hand to make sure she had his attention. "Does Angel have Xander?"

Buffy's own eyes welled up with tears as she saw Oz fight for control of his emotions. He quickly lost the battle and his own eyes filled with tears as he relived the horror in his mind. "He.. uh…I think Angelus killed him. He was going to make him into a vampire, but then he just - drained him. Buffy, we tried to stop him. We really tried. But he was so strong and he was gonna kill Willow. Then he got a hold of Xander and Willow - " he broke off, unable to tell the slayer how Willow had wanted to trade her life for Xander's. "Angel must have him now."

Buffy's eyes finally spilled over. "No," she whispered. "No, Xander can't be dead." If he's dead, it's my fault, she added silently in her mind. It's all my fault. It's my fault Angel turned. It's my fault I wasn't strong enough to stop him when I could. All the pain in my life…She looked down at Willow, she thought of Giles and corrected herself… All the pain in our lives - it's all my fault.

Cordelia returned to the alley and bent down to look at Willow. Buffy was crying openly now, shaking and trying not to sob for fear of jostling Willow. "Buffy?" Cordelia asked hesitantly. She couldn't remember ever seeing the slayer cry like this in any of their situations. And then she seemed to realize that Xander wasn't there. "Oh no!" Cordelia cried, understanding dawning upon her. "Does Angel have him? Please Buffy, we've got to go save him. Oz can wait for the ambulance - " She stood up abruptly and was going to pull the slayer to her feet when Oz's soft voice stopped her in her tracks.

"It's too late," he said simply.

Cordelia stood still momentarily in disbelief. "But -- I love him," she whispered quietly to herself. She loved him. As she finally admitted the fact to herself the feeling overwhelmed her. She'd been pretending up until now - pretending she could just walk away from Xander when she chose.

Now, she didn't have the choice anymore. And she loved him. She began shaking as her legs gave out. Oz awkwardly caught her and lowered her to the ground, holding her trembling form as she cried. He looked at Buffy, an obvious wreck with tears running freely on either side of her face. The normally strong slayer was replaced by a young woman overwrought with anguish and guilt. Willow still showed no signs of consciousness. And Cordelia was scream-crying her grief. How could this happen? He thought. How could their world, albeit a dangerous and crazy world, be destroyed so utterly in a matter of moments?

Then they heard the sound of an approaching siren.