Willow rolled her eyes. "Computer Science. Room 204. You're supposed to TEACH the class, but I'd really rather you just let them surf the net. Ask them to find the latest news on that computer company lawsuit. Oh, but check on David Wilkie. All he ever does is download pictures of naked women."

"Lawsuit?" Xander began mumbling in protest. "But that's so bor--. Did you say naked?"

Buffy looped her arm through Xander's and gestured to Willow and Oz. "I've got French just down the hall from there. I'll drop him in the right place." Willow nodded and turned to go the other way with Oz. "And then I'll pick him up after because Will and I have second period together after that." Her eyes widened and Willow swiveled back around to grasp Buffy's other arm as she finished the sentence.

"Gym!" they exclaimed in horrified unison.

"Gym!" Xander echoed enthusiastically. "Hoo-rah! I've been waiting my whole life for this opportunity." He high-fived an imaginary other hand. "The girls locker room. And they can't throw me out because I am one. *This* is the greatest day of my life."

"You can't go to gym!" Willow protested. "There's the locker room!"

"And the showers," Buffy added.

"And underwear and bras."

"And the showers," Buffy chimed.

"And the bodies and the nakedness."

"Which will be wet from the showers."

Xander's smile grew wider as their protests increased.

"Cordy'll be mad!" Willow pointed out to Xander.

He mulled over the possibility that Cordelia might skin him alive when she found out. "You're my bestest buds. You wouldn't tell her about this, would you?"

Willow and Buffy nodded vigorously. "Girl code. We'd hafta tell," Buffy said.

"Well, then I would just have to explain to her that this was an unfortunate circumstance of other unfortunate circumstances and I couldn't get out of it."

"What?" Buffy asked. "That made no sense."

Exasperated, Willow turned to Oz. "Oz. Tell him he can't go!"

Oz looked at Willow's body up and down. "Will, he's got all the right equipment to blend in. It's only going to be this one time. The only other option would be skipping class."

"Yeah!" Xander rushed in. "I could ditch, but then your perfect record would be ruined."

Willow bit her lower lip as she looked from Buffy to Xander in her body and then to Oz. "Is there anything else we can do?" she asked Buffy desperately.

Buffy thought for a moment before shrugging. "I can't think of anything without ditching. Sorry Will." She brightened as a thought came to her. "But I'll be there, y'know, so I can keep him in line. Mostly... Probably… Maybe."

Willow sighed. "For the record, I don't like this." She glanced at her watch. "We've really gotta run now or we'll be late." She grabbed Xander's face by the chin and stared menacingly into his eyes. "Be-have!" she demanded, enunciating each syllable and squeezing his chin tighter as she spoke.

Xander's eyes widened in surprise. "I, uh, okay."

Willow gave him one final warning stare and turned to jog down the hall. Oz easily loped into jog beside her.

"C'mon," Buffy encouraged, grabbing his arm and leading him away. "The last thing I need is another tardy."

"Buff?" Xander asked as they broke into a light run.

"Yeah?"

"Do we have time to get that camera out of your locker?"

Buffy didn't even break stride as her hand came out of seemingly nowhere to smack Xander resoundingly on the arm. "Ow! Willow never gets hit this much," Xander grumbled.

Xander Harris closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. < Who would've thought a locker room could smell so good? > The scents of various perfumes liberally powdered the air, with the basic scent of femaleness everywhere.

"Your eyes are closed. Good," Buffy said before she lightly grabbed his arm and pulled him to a row of lockers. "This is Willow's locker," she said softly, placing her hand on a nondescript locker in the middle.

Xander nodded absently and whipped his head around to follow the movements of Kimberly, a quiet blonde girl in some of his classes. He made a small, strangled noise as she removed a lacy yellow bra and reached for a sports bra in her locker. Buffy looked up at the noise and followed his line of sight. "I liked it better when you had your eyes closed," she said warningly. Buffy opened her own locker impatiently and fished around inside for a moment. She finally pulled out a piece of paper and handed it to Xander. "Here's Willow's combination. Get changed."

Xander tore his gaze from Kimberly and back to Buffy. "Umhbrugh," he murmured.

"Yeah, you're welcome," she tossed back, gathering her clothes into her arms. "I'm going over there to change," she said, pointing to the next row of lockers. "You WILL be changed and ready when I get back. And behave!" she added, making sure the hint of menace in her voice wouldn't be overlooked.

Xander glanced at Buffy as she moved away and then returned his attention to the young blonde a few feet away. He sighed as Kimberly finally pulled a Sunnydale High shirt over her form. Kimberly turned and smiled at him. "Hi Willow."

Xander promptly turned about nine shades of red. He felt strangely guilty all of a sudden ."Uh, hi."

Kimberly looked at him quizzically as she moved to the door to the gym.

Xander looked at the piece of paper in his hands and again at the row of lockers in front of him. < Oh, crap. Which one did she say was Willow's? > For a few moments, cold fear spread through his stomach as he pictured the various tortures Buffy might visit upon him if he wasn't changed when she got back. He reached for a locker, hoping it was the right one, when a flash of pink flesh and purple crossed his peripheral vision. He turned his head slowly in the direction of the color, and felt his jaw drop as he spotted Harmony standing there in a small purple bra and, of all things, thong underwear. < Girls locker room, heaven. Same thing. > He was instantly mesmerized by that thin purple string disappearing and then reappearing in flesh.

Harmony moved out of his line of sight, and without even thinking, without pondering Buffy's reaction for an instant, he immediately followed. He reached the end of the row of lockers in time to see her head for a door at the end of the small aisle. He looked around cautiously for Buffy. Not seeing her, he quickly moved to follow Harmony.

Buffy pulled her T-shirt over her head just in time to see Harmony pass by at the far end of the aisle. She shook her head at Harmony's attempt at shocking underwear and pulled off her pants….And then she saw Xander in Willow's body, hypnotically following Harmony as if she had an invisible leash around his neck.

Her initial reaction was to cover herself up, but then she remembered that Xander wasn't remotely acknowledging her existence at this moment. "Xa---Willow!" she hissed in warning, but he either didn't hear her or was willing to risk her wrath because he kept walking until he was out of her sight. She briefly considered giving chase, but she didn't want to have Xander memorize what she looked like in her undergarments. < No, that wouldn't be *too* uncomfortable in two hours. > She hurriedly tried to finish dressing so she could catch up with him. And then hopefully make him hurt. Badly.

The movement of Harmony's rear end as she walked had taken up all of Xander's world. When she disappeared into a door at the end of the hall, he didn't hesitate to follow. The first thing he noticed upon opening the door was a sudden warmth. Followed immediately by steam. Which directly preceded the large number of senior girls and their lack of clothing. Xander stared in open-mouthed shock and delight as the girls chatted and washed, washed and chatted.

"Get out of the way, dork!" a voice demanded. Dimly he noticed Harmony push past him to leave, a bottle of lotion in her hands.

Xander spent the next minute memorizing every detail of the lovely ladies soaping up some ten feet away from him. Then he heard an ominous sound. The sound of Buffy clearing her throat. Xander instantly knew the fear that a vampire must feel right before Buffy lunged with a stake. He turned slowly, careful to paste a hopefully sheepish I-couldn't-help-myself, I'm-only-mortal-Xander-smile on his face.

Buffy was definitely not amused.

"I couldn't remember which locker?" Xander tried, bestowing a lopsided grin upon his friend.

"Follow me," Buffy said coldly.

Xander cast one longing glance over his shoulder to the showers as he hastened to obey. Buffy led him to the lockers again, and quietly snatched the paper with Willow's locker combination from his hands. She opened the locker in seething silence and then turned to him expectantly.

"Undress," she ordered.

Xander looked shocked for a moment. "But, I can't. You might see…" he trailed off, a deep blush staining his cheeks.

"Don't you dare give me the Willow-shy act!" She leaned in close to his ear. "You're NOT Willow. Now undress."

She turned away from him, to offer him some privacy, and he hurried to change into the gym clothes in front of him.

Buffy listened carefully as Xander changed, mentally noting when his shoes were done, his shorts… She contained her anger and struggled to fight the urge to grab Xander and throttle him. < There is NO way I can endure this again… > Buffy bit her lip, trying to think of a way to make Xander get changed when none of the girls were around. She, being the Slayer and not part of the research squad, was genuinely surprised when an actual plan began to form in her head.

Willow entered the library and looked around. It was empty. Even Giles was gone. She threw Xander's book bag on the table and plunked down into one of the chairs. < Gee, that was a Xander-move. > She pondered for a moment how strange it was that she found it so easy to slip into his character and mannerisms. < If we don't get back where we belong soon, I'm afraid I'll forget how to be me. > Her stomach growled loudly and she reached for the bag to dig out the extra muffin her mother had bestowed upon her this morning. She rooted around for a minute before she remembered that she had eaten it right after first period this morning. She began the quest for money instead. Finding enough to get a pop and some chips, she stood and headed for the door.

Giles chose that moment to enter.

"Oh, h-h-hello," he stuttered, surprised to find her there.

"Hi," Willow replied. "So. You had your own field trip?" She arched her own eyebrow as she realized that she had just uttered words that Xander easily could have spouted. < My name is Willow Rosenberg. I like my boyfriend Oz, computers, and strawberry ice cream with chocolate sauce…. > She sighed resignedly. "I mean, have you found out anything new?"

"I, uh, decided to visit the main office and check Cordelia's attendance record. She is, um, still listed as absent."

"And since the day's already half over, she's probably not coming in today," Willow continued, returning to her seat and rubbing her cheek tiredly with one hand as she finished the sentence.

"Well, that's not necessarily the -"

"Hey Will!" Xander grumbled, throwing open the library door and heading immediately for the seat opposite her own.

Willow was about to reply when Buffy bounded in behind him. "Hey," Buffy offered.

Willow watched in a mixture of fascination and alarm as Xander threw himself unceremoniously into a chair and proceeded to sulk… Heavily. "Xander! If you keep flinging me around like that I'm going to get bruised!" Willow protested.

"You shouldn't worry about me. Worry about Buffy knocking you on your butt and leaving bruises," he replied crossly.

"Don't mind him," Buffy chirped, sitting beside Willow. "He's being crabby."

"Why? What happened? Something bad happen in gym?"

"Well," Buffy began, "Do you want his version or the real story?"

Willow started rubbing her temples in preparation for what was to come. Giles noted her action and quickly sought solace in the back stacks of the library, away from the teenager angst and explosion zone.

"Did he -- ? I mean, what -?" Willow stumbled over words as she thought of all the things Xander could have done in that locker room. But he was definitely unhappy, so Buffy must have stymied a couple of his plans.

Oz entered through the doors and disrupted her train of thought. "Hey!" He took careful note of Xander's sullen expression. "What's up?"

Buffy blew some hair out of her eyes and gestured vaguely in Xander's direction. "He fell," she stated simply.

Xander jumped up in an explosive protest, "YOU PUSHED ME!"

Willow's eyes widened as she looked from Xander's enraged red face to Buffy's and back again. "Fell?" she repeated carefully.

"PUSHED!" Xander exclaimed, beginning to unzip Willow's jeans. "Look at this bruise!" he demanded, pushing the jeans to his knees and showing Willow a dark bluish spot on his hip.

Willow immediately blushed and then jumped up to cover Oz's eyes. "Xander!"

Oz grinned widely with her hands over his eyes. "Willow, baby, I'm afraid you were two seconds too late."

Willow uttered a low warning hiss at him as Buffy stood in front of Xander, trying to block any view Oz might get from under Willow's hands.

Xander, completely oblivious to what Buffy was trying to do, stepped around her. "Look!" he thrust the bruised area in Willow's general direction. "It hurts!"

"Xander, put those jeans back on RIGHT now!" Willow demanded.

Xander looked up, almost as if he'd been detached from the whole situation and had just woken up. "Oh, yeah, right, of course," he mumbled, pulling the jeans back up to his waist and zipping them closed. "Sorry, Will," he offered sheepishly.

Willow let out an exasperated sigh and uncovered Oz's eyes. The fact that he was still grinning sent her blood boiling. She could feel her own cheeks red-hot with embarrassment. "What happened?" she asked, turning to Buffy.

Buffy sighed and hopped up on the circulation counter. "Well, Xander acted up a little when we were getting changed for gym-"

"Acted up how?" Willow interrupted, sending a dangerous glance in Xander's direction. He blushed and suddenly took great interest in a stack of books Giles had left on the table.

"Well. He took forever to get changed so he could look at the girls as much as possible. And he was completely drooling over Harmony's thong underwear." She thought for a moment and tried to decide how to phrase the next part. "Um, and uh, when I went around the corner to get changed so he wouldn't see me, he kinda snuck into the showers and got an eyeful of the senior girls who had just finished their class." She finished with somewhat of a triumphant note, noting that Xander was looking anywhere in the library except Willow.

Which was a good thing, because if he had caught her evil stare he might have just turned to dust on the spot.

"Xander?" Willow inquired sweetly. "Is that right?"

Xander finally met her eyes and visibly shrank away from her, the staunch denial on his lips dying and being replaced with a simple, "Kinda."

Willow paced back and forth angrily for a few moments, trying not to lose her temper. She turned to Buffy. "What about the bruise?"

Buffy scrunched up her nose and made a face. "Well, my plan didn't exactly go off as well as I'd hoped," she began. "See, I didn't want him to gawk at all the girls again, so I thought that if I injured myself and made him come with me to the nurse's office, then he wouldn't get the chance. So, when we were running laps, I kinda… um.. took a dive."

Willow's eyebrows knitted together.

"Then how'd he get hurt?"

"She pushed me!" Xander exclaimed. "She fell into me and knocked me right on my hip!"

"Which was good because then we were both sent to the nurse's office without me having to ask for him to come with me," Buffy pointed out. "I didn't mean to, Xand, you already know that. I mean, you were just trying to look at Gina, and it's not entirely my fault that you weren't running in a straight line. How many times do I have to say 'sorry'?"

Willow sighed and closed her eyes. < Cordelia had better get here soon > she thought ominously. "Xander," she sighed, "It was an accident."

"I AM sorry, Xander," Buffy offered. "I didn't mean to crash into you and make fall too."

Xander looked from Buffy's regretful face and back to his own furious Willow-inhabited body. "I know," he finally replied.

"So you guys are good then?" Willow clarified.

Buffy and Xander looked at each other for a moment and then nodded.

"Can I go get some food now?" Willow prodded.

Buffy and Xander put on their best 'We'll be good' smiles and nodded again.

"Okay, hug each other and I can leave."

Buffy and Xander stood and hugged tightly for a moment. Willow smiled as she got the rare sight of what exactly she and Buffy must look like whenever they hugged. Buffy and Xander broke apart and turned to Willow. "Satisfied?" Xander asked.

"Yup, everything's peachy," Willow mumbled, heading out into the hall for the cafeteria.

Xander made a special effort to stay on Willow's good side once she returned to the library. He already knew that she wasn't hesitant about using his body for revenge, and he didn't want her to get angry again.

Willow, for her part, just kept thanking whatever God was out there that Ross hadn't happened to come looking for her when Xander had her jeans around her knees.

They entered their geometry class together after lunch, their careful silence going unnoticed in the room full of chattering students.

Xander sat in Willow's traditional seat and turned around to face her. "Will, I'm sorry," he said softly, so only she could hear.

Willow warily searched his expression, trying to see if he was sincere. Finding what she was searching for, she sighed. "Xander, if you weren't my best friend, I don't know what I'd do with you."

He smiled broadly. "But I am your best friend. So you get to keep an eye on me and you get the full benefits of all my friendship."

Willow rolled her eyes. "Does the bruise hurt very much?"

Xander grinned and shifted in his seat. "Not as much anymore. I just want Buffy to feel guilty about it."

"Buffy has enough to worry about on an average day," Willow pointed out, "So knock it off."

"Yessir," Xander replied with a mock salute.

The class grew suddenly quiet as Mr. Andrews, the geometry teacher, took his place at the front of the classroom. He peered out at the sea of students over his bifocals, as he did every other period before launching into the latest boring lecture on angles and hypotenuses. Then he did something unexpected.

"Pop quiz," he called out simply.

Willow felt her heart plummet to her toes as she examined Xander sitting in front of her. He would fail this quiz for sure, and that would bring down her average. She bit her lip in nervous indecision as Xander turned to look at her, his worried face unconsciously mimicking her state of mind.

Even Willow was surprised by what happened next. "Mr. Andrews!" she called out eagerly, raising her hand.

He peered at her over his bifocals. "Xander?"

"Um. Willow just said she wasn't feeling well. Can I take her to the nurse's office?"

The other students in the room began whispering and a light buzz settled over the atmosphere as everyone waited for Mr. Andrews' reaction.

He approached Xander and stared at Willow's face. He reached out and felt Willow's forehead. "You seem fine. What's the problem?"

Xander gulped a few times.

"He fell in gym and bumped his head!" Willow exclaimed from behind him.

"Yes!" Xander rushed to agree. "Everything's still a bit fuzzy."

Mr. Andrews looked around the room for a moment. "Aura? Did Miss Rosenberg have a fall today?"

Aura stopped popping her gum and looked terrified. "Yes," she squeaked out.

Mr. Andrews peered down at Xander again over his glasses. "Very well. Aura, could you take Willow to the nurse's office please?" He whirled around to face Willow even before she could begin her protest. "You, Mr. Harris, are still going to take this quiz."

Willow leaned back in her chair and smiled slightly as Xander stood to leave. "Yeah. Of course. Good," she felt an overwhelming relief that the danger had passed even though she hadn't seen the test yet. She curbed the impulse to shout, "Bring it on!" and instead settled for waving at Xander as Aura led him out of the room. She'd hook up with him in the library after school.